We can’t get away from it: ‘life’ is uncertainty. The middle two letters are even: “IF”! That’s the way it is. If we grasp with our desire for certainty, we are trying to swim against the current. Life is hardly ever certain. When we seek certainty, we worry; we check and check again – and again; we avoid experiences; we seek reassurance; and, we dig into routine and cling to habit. But, when we can accept uncertainty, we seek new experiences to learn from them; we are open with curiosity; we are spontaneous; and, we are willing to tolerate some discomfort.
Embracing inevitable uncertainty, we are able to enjoy life more, and be more flexible in the face of challenges.
Felice Leonardo “Leo” Buscaglia (1924 – 1998), known as “Dr. Love,” was an American author and motivational speaker, and a professor in the Department of Special Education at the University of Southern California. When he was lecturing at the University of Southern California, Dr Buscaglia was saddened by a student’s suicide and contemplated our human disconnectedness and the meaning of life.
In response, he developed a non-credit class he called ‘Love 1A’ that became the basis for his first book – Love. Buscaglia wrote this: “The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has nothing, is nothing, and becomes nothing. He may avoid suffering and sorrow, but he simply cannot learn, feel, change, grow, or love. Chained by his certitude, he is a slave; he has forfeited his freedom. Only the person who risks is truly free”.
If we are not used to accepting risk but feel it may be time to change, we might be best served by starting small and working up to bigger risks.
Here are a few possible small ‘risks’ – behaviours we can use to help develop more acceptance, even a joy in, uncertainty:
- Walk a different path to the one you normally take, go a different way.
- Enrol in a new course – nowadays online is certainly possible
- Watch a DVD without reading a review or plot summary
- Watch a TV show you normally wouldn’t
- Read an article or book by a different author
- Talk to a stranger
- Wear a different item of clothing to those you normally wear
- Talk about a risky topic with some-one – don’t avoid a disagreement
- Sit in a different place at home or in a staff-room
- Sleep on a different side of the bed
- Try a different toothpaste or cosmetic
- Order something different from the take-away menu
- Go somewhere you’ve not been before
- Eat something different for breakfast, lunch or tea
- Engage in an activity you haven’t before
- Listen to a radio station you haven’t before
- Give a task you normally think you should do to someone else
- Take on the idea that it is beneficial to take small risks in doing something you’d normally not think of or reject
- Develop a ‘curious scientist’ mind-set or child-like curiosity about trying different things
- Notice your response and reaction.
And, remember: “Only the person who risks is truly free”. Practice small-ish risks and see your freedom grow!